Welcome to the TechRadar Sea of Thieves review. Sea of Thieves is a brand new online multiplayer game from Rare studios which has launched on Xbox One and Windows PC. It sees you take up the role of a pirate and sail the Sea of Thieves by your lonesome or with a crew of up to four to chase your dreams of becoming a legendary pirate. This is a game that encourages you to forge your own adventure so it's completely up to you what you do in this open game world.
Sea of Thieves is an always-online service based game which means it's never-ending, ever-growing and an expansive game to review. In light of that, TechRadar's Captain Emma Boyle will be spending a week with the game and she'll record her adventures in a daily Captain's Log to give you a taste of what you can expect if you're thinking about flying the pirate flag yourself.
Time: Quite Dark
I wake up in a tavern, blinking against the dull light and find it empty apart from myself and the barmaid. Stumbling over to stand in front of her, I notice she can’t seem to look me in the eye. Last night must have been bad.
I dig through my pockets to see what’s been taken and find it all there: my paltry stock of bananas, my compass, my watch, my shovel and a lantern (unlit – I always sit with a slight lean after the burned buttocks escapade so I’ll never make that mistake again).
My tankard is even still there. And it’s full! I drink deep and the room takes on a friendly, fuzzy green glow. As I step towards the music box on the bartop I find my steps are a tad uneven and the music sounds all wrong, almost like it's drunk.
But at least I haven’t had a vom – never mind. The barmaid looks utterly nonplussed which makes me feel simultaneously better and worse.
Feeling it’s probably best that I get out into the world, I refill my tankard with my favorite kraken’s vomit-based grog and get on my way.
The decking under my feet when I step out onto the island is uneven but solid beneath my feet and I make my way down onto the sand to speak to some of the traders that have set up for the day. The sun is rising, taking the time from quite dark to less dark.
I chat to the Gold Hoarders for a while and pick up a quest scroll before moving on to do the same with the Order of Souls and Merchant’s Alliance. They all seem like reasonably simple voyages so I decide to get started given my coin purse has more holes than gold coins at the moment.
Hopping onto my small sloop (SS. Pugwash), I make my way to my captain’s cabin and assess which quest I’m going to embark on first. This is the beauty of not having to answer to a crew – my decision is the final one. It’s not always a good one. But at least I don't have to argue about it.
Settling on the Merchant’s Alliance quest, I see I’m tasked with picking up and delivering one red speckled chicken and one white feather chicken. Seems easy enough. Picking up my coops from the Alliance representative on the dockside, I return to my ship and prepare to set sail.
Sailing on your own is an interesting experience. It’s frantic and difficult but when you get into a rhythm it becomes enjoyable.
Directing the wheel away from the dock, I lower the sails and lift the anchor before running back to the wheel. Using the compass to my right I make sure I’m travelling north west and settle in for the journey.
Conveniently, the wind hits my sails and I pick up speed. Less conveniently I pick up speed straight into a storm. People have told me that I’ve probably not picked the best career for someone that dislikes rain. I only ever think they’re right when it’s actually raining.
The storm is relentless and the sky is dark and unforgiving. Up ahead of me I see a small island surrounded by a formation of rocks and decide to head towards it. Moving towards so many dangerous jagged rocks that are so close together probably isn’t the best move given the weather but this island might have chickens and I’m not willing to pass that up.
Maneuvering around the rocks and dropping anchor, I leap from my ship into the stormy water before kicking out towards the island which is much smaller than I initially thought. I find it doesn’t have chickens. It has snakes. Several snakes. I momentarily wonder if I could catch them and argue that they’re de-feathered chickens but I doubt, like actual chickens (and snakes thank God), that would fly.
Disposing of the snakes I head back to the ship to set a new heading. I’m grateful the storm has passed while I’ve been on the island. What I’m less grateful for is the water the ship has taken on in my absence. Going below deck I take out my bucket and start bailing myself out. I really should get a person for this.
When I start sailing again I notice a giant glowing skull on the horizon and hesitate. My mind is telling me no. But my body, my body… is also desperately telling me no.
But the course I’ve set for myself and the direction of the wind are forcefully telling me yes. Great.
I’m glad the storm has passed because the vibes are bad enough without some atmospheric lightning alongside the skull. Even Batman would pointedly ignore this particular signal.
Without the storm around me I can see that the water is a bright inviting blue and the sky is bright. Finally I can see the island I originally set a heading for coming closer. It’s coming closer quite quickly actually. Too quickly.
I start shouting commands to my crew. And by crew I mean me. I raise the sails in an effort to slow myself down and in the end I just throw down the anchor. The ship squeals to a stop just before it hits the island. I’m pretty sure if the SS Pugwash had a figurehead it’d be wiping sweat off its brow right now. I really hope ships can reverse.
Jumping from the ship I find that this island is also lacking in chickens and I wonder if they’ve gone the way of the unicorn. What it does have, though, is a shipwreck in a lagoon at its center. But as I’m diving into it I realize it has sharks too. Hungry sharks. I hear the bite before I see the teeth and I scream in shock.
Abandoning the shipwreck I scamper back towards my ship as fast as possible, wondering if the point of this quest is to discover that I was the chicken all along.
Back on board I eat a banana to restore my health (skin on because I have a feeling mine unfortunately is not).
If this next island doesn’t have chickens I’ll tar and feather myself for the merchant.
Approaching the next island I’m happy to see I’m still a safe distance from the still-glowing skull. I decide to pull out my spyglass to assess its chicken population instead of swimming ashore. To my delight I spot a chicken. Two chickens!
Wasting no time, I grab a coop from below deck and dive from the ship to head towards the shore.
Knowing that I’m looking for highly specific kinds of chicken I start my search, resolutely refusing to be distracted by the pigs that also call this island their home. I will not be fooled.
When I spot the chicken I’m looking for I chase it down, holding the coop in front of me like a ticking bomb. It turns out chickens are quite fast but once I’ve caught the white feathered demon I quietly weep into its feathers in relief.
A shrill cluck wakes me from my emotional reverie and I hurry to swim back to the ship, making sure I keep the chicken above the water. Do you know how hard it is to hold a caged chicken aloft while swimming through tumultuous seas? Not very actually, and I didn’t grudge doing it a second time.
Once my chickens are stored below deck I set a course for Dagger Tooth Outpost and check my watch. One day to get there on time. Not great but possible as long as I’m not waylaid by another crew.
It’s when I start sailing north east and realize the wind is going to be blowing against me the whole time that I wonder what I have done to make mother nature hate me so. At least I’m now moving away from the skull.
As soon as I relax behind the wheel the chickens begin to cluck incessantly below deck and I wonder just how worth it this has all been. By the time I get to Dagger Tooth Outpost I'll probably be clucking too.
After a long journey which sees me running desperately back and forth between my wheel and the small balcony from which I can see my map, my destination comes into view. The entire time I was sailing I was half-expecting some sails to come over the horizon, bringing a crew determined to send my chickens and I down to Davy Jones’ KFC.
Thankfully they didn’t and it’s with delight that I throw my anchor down and swim my chickens towards the shore.
I have to say, the merchant doesn’t seem particularly pleased to see me or impressed that I’ve managed to find the exact chickens she asked for. But I think I’m joyful enough for both of us.
The night is drawing in and I decide it’s time for a grog and a sleep. I hope tomorrow features less poultry.